As I was nearing the end of my second week at Tricoci University, I was feeling very worn out. There was this heavy burden surrounding me that I just wanted to be rid of. Now, as I have been thinking about this weight, I am realizing that it's not going to be just taken away from me.. I have to accept the grace that God is freely handing me and press on. I have to be the light in a darkened place.
After being "sheltered" from the world and things of the world for the past 2 years, it has been almost a shock entering a secular environment. Yeah, I obviously knew that it would be different, but there are just some things I didn't anticipate. One example is that I actually forgot how much people can complain. When they don't have the joy of salvation or the hope that we can have in Christ, why not complain about the tiniest thing? Another example, the language. Not only the actual words, but also the entire atmosphere of conversations.
I don't see my potential struggles being, "what if I become like them..", but more like "what if I get so annoyed/frustrated/overwhelmed that I can't control myself.." I have been praying for grace and strength to ignore, and not pay attention to talk that is not beneficial. I feel that my classmates have already noticed this in me and realize that I am "different". Several have asked if they made me uncomfortable or if I have been bothered. I am just praying that God will use me as an example to these girls. That they will continue to see this "difference" in me.. That I WILL be the light in this darkened place.
I drive around 30 minutes to school and then 30 minutes back home everyday. I cannot tell you how many times I have listened to the song The Greatness of Our God by Hillsong this week. God has used this song to uplift me and give me the extra umph! that I need to get through the day. I hope these words speak to you all as well as I pass on the lyrics!
Give me eyes to see more of who You are. May what I behold still my anxious heart.
Take what I have known, and break it all apart. For You my God, are greater still.
No sky contains, No doubt restrains, All You are, The greatness of our God.
I spend my life to know, and I'm far from close to all You are, The greatness of our God.
Give me grace to see beyond this moment here. To believe that there is nothing left to fear.
That You alone are high above it all. For You my God, are greater still.
No sky contains, No doubt restrains, All You are, The greatness of our God.
I spend my life to know, and I'm far from close to all You are, The greatness of our God.
And there is nothing that can ever separate us. There is nothing that can everseparate us from Your love. No life, no death, of this I am convinced. You my God, are greater still
And no words can say, or song convey, all You are the greatness of our God.
I spend my life to know, and I'm far from closeto all You are, the greatness of our God.
No sky contains, No doubt restrains, All You are, The greatness of our God.
I spend my life to know, and I'm far from close to all You are, The greatness of our God.
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